I had a difficult summer. The company I worked for since 2003 closed down without notice (or severance pay). A week later, the horse that had been my partner in the show ring, EGC coaching and my own journey through advanced stage cancer required me to step up and release him from the frail body that could no longer contain his massive spirit. I needed to find a new way to show up in the world, without the security blanket of a job that didn’t suit me, and without the quiet presence that had been a major source of my comfort (and frustration) for 22 years.

I thought cancer diagnosis and treatment had taught me resilience. It turned out I had more lessons to learn. I am beginning to accept that the classroom never closes. I have struggled to find out where I belong. I have done lots of research, laid lots of “track”, and yet nothing seemed to be gelling into something that would work for me and allow me to make the difference in the world I intend to.

I woke up in the middle of the night a couple of weeks ago with the concept I’m now putting together as keynotes, workshops and seminar series. “Candor With Kindness” is the concept that I will be teaching. These days, it seems that the balance between honesty and empathy is often strained. I knew the title, and I knew what “candor” stood for.

The CAN goes together, of course. Caring, Acceptance and Nurturance. Acceptance is beyond tolerance – it is welcoming the other.

The D is for dedication. Dedication both to one another and to identifiable, shared goals.

The O is for observation and objectivity – developing the ability to lift ourselves out of the emotion and witness what is happening.

The R is for respect. This is the foundation, the fundamental requirement on which everything rests. The respect must be mutual, and comprehensive. Respect for oneself, and for others.

The development of these programs is nearing completion. I am passionate about getting the message out. I am teaching that which I am most eager to learn. I feel divinely guided in sharing these concepts. Things feel like they’re coming together. And I’m feeling much better, thank you!!

Originally published in the shared blog https://womenmoveitforward.wordpress.com 2017/04/17

Candor With Kindness